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Dream: Erika and another girl have jobs. I'm a tag along. We go to an antique store. I'm looking at jeelry boxes and cars shoes for Baha. Looking at clothes .It's flossies. They buy stuff, a little stuff. she tries to charge me more and I don't have enough. I hwggoe for 42 but its not enough. I have moved from the apartment to Bahas room. But I'm sleeping on a mattress o. The floor. The box spring leans against a wall. In what appears to be the master bedroom, during work hours e and that girl are in bed and e asks me to hook up with her. Happyness ensues. Have to stop at the bathroom, her friend convinces her that im be bad in bed. Back at flossiee picking out stuff I want just not loving it so that I could have furniture. Very feminine furniture. With roses and gardenias. On the way back I see e friend and we have a moment and we kiss and it sparks something. We kiss and have sex.

Was with my ex. As usual he seems busy involve in his work. Then I realized he got a third eye above his right eye. He said has been 2 months . I asked if it came naturally or by. Surgery. Then he refused to answer. Silent. I started telling him that. I was really unhappy during his last trip back home and said he must be hiding something from me. Ihen he seems like going to tear I ask if he is sick or any sickness I tried to comfort him saying that all people get sick as we age, then I hold him I was half naked ask ask him what else he has done to himself? And I said he is not physically sick but mentally sick!

I cannot recall the build-up to the event (if there was any build-up at all). All I can remember is seeing my younger brother chained to a wooden frame. He was anxious. His friend (Richard) approached him with an electronic cutting device and started cutting the skin and tissue away from the left side of my brother's face and neck, damaging nerves and blood vessels in the process. I don't know why, but I knew he was't trying to kill my brother. I wasn't sure why he was doing it. Although I can't remember my brother calling out for help at first (as he would obviously do in real life!), as the cutting went on my brother's voice was damaged and he was trying to call for help at that point (in a hoarse voice). Up until this point, I was completely powerless to intervene. I wasn't chained or tied up myself ... it was as though I wasn't actually there during the event, but had witnessed it ... a really strange feeling. And once Richard had stopped cutting and walked several yards away, I physically appeared. I went up close to my brother and spoke to him. He was still asking for help in a weak and hoarse voice. I asked him if he wanted me to kill him, to end his suffering. I remember feeling immensely upset and overwhelmed with pity for what my brother had just had to endure. He replied to my question, but his voice was too weak for me to understand what he was saying. Then I took the cutting tool myself and tried to cut his windpipe (which was almost visible) to end his life and shorten my brother's suffering. And for some reason I couldn't do it which is ridiculous (as I am a doctor), but I could not find the wind-pipe to sever it! Then I woke up worried sick for my brother ... I was in a cold sweat, my heart was racing. I even contemplated phoning him at 5 in the morning to make sure he was ok. The dream was so vivid, especially the emotions I was feeling during the dream. I hardly ever have nightmares and weirdly, if I do have them I usually enjoy them and find them entertaining. But this was completely different to any dream I had experienced. I didn't enjoy it one bit. It was really horrible.

I had to pack a bag very quickly. I was in the bedroom and knew there was a dead 'roadkill' type animal under my bed. I tried not to look but couldn't help noticing the guts all over the floor and the blood. I looked and notied a huge dog sizes rat, still alive and badly suffering. It had its top part of the skill taken off and the brain exposed, blood and internal organs everywhere. I was so sad and knew it was badly suffering but couldn't bring myself to kill it and put it out of its misery. I walked away feeling terrible and so guilty at my weakness.

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