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I have the same dream every few months or so and it's as if I am aware that I'm sleep. I can hear the TV, see my wife, see the dog and they are where they are actually sleeping. I can even see myself. It is as if I am standing over my body. There is always the same person standing next to me. I believe it to be satan. He is a older white male and his hair is slicked back. He is wearing an extremely nice suit and a large gold and diamond ring. His eyes are completely black and his voice sounds like a choir of tenors. He is extremely well spoken and calm. He has a black mist/fog that stays around him. We stand together over my sleeping body. I tell myself this is a dream and to wake up. I panic and try to wake my sleeping body and the dark figure laughs and tells me he will not allow me to wake up. He says that he will keep me. I call for my wife next to me to wake me up. On several occasions she actually hears me and wakes me up and can even tell me what I was saying. I have had this dream multiple times and the dark figure always looks the same and sounds the same.

I was staying in a hotel with friends and I was supposed to check out but I left to go on a walk and I couldn't go back and get my stuff. At some point in my dream I started spitting up small blood clots. I had to carry a non-see through bottle around with me at all times so I could spit in it. The clots continued to get larger and larger to where I couldn't breath as it was coming up. My high school boyfriend , who is very religious, came to my house with his wife to see if it was something satanic. He quickly realized that it was not. He told his wife that God told him he was supposed to divorce her and be with me. She was fine with it because God said it. Meanwhile I am married myself. He and I then just continue to live our lives like normal with the exception that I am still spitting up these blood clots all day long. I asked him how could he even kiss me with all that going on and he said because I love you.

It always started with a vibrant color red slowly fading into the background, like a backdrop of evil setting the scene. Around the edges and into the corners of my vision were black shadows, the darkest I had ever seen. I entered from the left, terrified beyond measure, yet determined to get what I came for; my grandparents’ release from Hell, from the bondage of Satan himself. Nana and Papo, my paternal grandparents, would enter from the right, distraught, resigned, yet, a bit hopeful. I ran to them, hugging and kissing them. I can still feel the way my grandfather’s solid middle felt against my skinny, half-grown arms. And then there was Satan. His voice boomed over us like thunder. My heart seized with panic and sank like a rock within me as terror washed over me like an ocean’s wave. For just a moment, the three of us huddled together, Nana, Papo and me. Then, after what felt like an eternity of being frozen in fear but seconds of being comforted by the warmth of their bodies, of their love, my voice found me. I freed myself from the entanglement of their arms and knew I had to do this on my own. I demanded their freedom. I asked that they be able to return with me to my home. While I do not remember the words that roared from the scoffing voice overhead, I remember that my request was denied. Nana and Papo had to stay in Hell. There was no question about it. Then, they turned and exited back from whence they had come, resigned, saddened but willing. I screamed. I screamed their names. I screamed in protest. I screamed because of the injustice. They did not belong there. They knew Jesus. And yet, it had not been enough. In that moment, He had not been enough. That’s when I would awake in a panic, crying, hardly able to breathe. Yet another thing was out of my control. Yet another injustice was being committed and I could do nothing. My voice was not being heard. My stomach was churning as was my heart.

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