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Dreams apart

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So I had started to dress nd act as a man but also keep up my female side. My friend came over to the Guy me apartment and we were hanging out, watching TC and chatting. She then came by daily and it became our normal routine as she hung out with both me's. Eventually both her and my other friend came over and we were hanging out playing truth or dare and both my best friend and I were dared to kiss. When we kissed I became intoxicated by her scent and by her in general and I could feel the desire in her kiss. The one left and the other one I made out with stayed. I had gotten a sex change at this point. We talked and kissed some more and then we sorta moved past that. I picked her up and brought her to my bedroom. I layer her on my bed and stripped her naked and had sex with her. Her brown hair was spread out over the bed and the passion and desire coming from her was intense. She had wanted me and fell in love with the male me. It was meant to be a prank but I fell head over heels in love with her and wanted to be with her forever.

My ex best friend died of lung cancer last year. We weren't on talking terms and I didn't know about his sickness . Came to know about it when he was admitted to the MICU. and he never returned home after that. I see him again and again. yesterday, I saw him living in my home .. my family was taking care of him. I was humming him to sleep patting him on his forehead like a baby. In the same dream he got fired by some policeman . I tried to save him. pushed him to the ground and covered him by wrapping myself around him but he got shot in the neck from side.. I brought him home back to my mother but then an earthquake hit, and everything started falling apart. he got bruises and blood all over because of the debris and glass peices falling every where, I just kept shouting no no no no I kept praying to god not to let him die but then he died in the dream and I woke up crying. What does it mean?

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