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John McAfee doing lines with Danny Thomas

John McAfee doing lines with Danny Thomas as a bunch of bored looking hookers chase greasy cheeseburgers with swigs of Ex-Lax. A big plastic dropcloth laid out on the floor. Video cameras on tripods.

The My Pillow guy became Emperor of

The My Pillow guy became Emperor of America and went on tv to declare martial law but he was wearing a dress and lipstick and a wig and the whole country started laughing and the laughter grew and grew and shook the ground until there was a giant earthquake and everyone died

I went to a bar with two

I went to a bar with two romantically interested men. One had dips and the other told him to hurry up or he'd take his shot. We sat down at the bar and ordered drinks. They had cocktails and I had a beer. Next thing I wake up on the floor with someone i don't know spooning me. When I wiggle away he comes back and as I get up to put him in his place he leaves the bar with his friend. As I follow them out I feel insulted and violated, telling him off. Just before he reaches the exits I try to literally kick his behind but a duvet around my lower body restricts my reach and I miss short. I turn around and walk back too realize the men are gone and I ask the bartender how long I've been sleeping. 2 hours he says

I was driving to work, I noticed

I was driving to work, I noticed as I passed by a bad wreck. The car had hit a telephone pole causing total damage to the front end. People surrounded the car. But I continued on to work. As I was pulling into my my jobs parking lot I noticed a female lion running about. That's when I noticed A mother horse dead with her throat ripped out. Her baby was at her feet writhing from the pain that it's mother was dead. As i began to look around I noticed several horses scattered around dead. My job has nothing to do with animals of any kind. Then I noticed a small mound of dirt and twigs I don't know why but I started digging under it and found a live infant so skinny with a white dress with blue flowers.

I was in a barn on country

I was in a barn on country property and it was dusk. In the barn was a grey cat sitting in the middlle and surrounded by other animals like mice birds.suddendly looking around i saw seven golden and brown snakes wiggling just under surface of the ground heading towards the cat and it suddenly struck and wi ded itself around the cat but I tapped the snake lightly and said leave the cat alone. The snake stopped and chased the other animals in the barn. More snakes appeared and killing off the animals. They all stopped and looked at me and disappeared.But it didn’t scare and the cat survived

Being followed by three men in women's

Being followed by three men in women's wigs and two little kids. They circle me about to attack me when the wind started. We look up and there are 6 tornadoes coming! The tornadoes are going through town, sweeping people and buildings up but all pass the nail salon. Until the last one. It took the building and spun it and spun it and as we passed My friends and they waved at me with smiles! I was so pissed and sure I was going to die that I jumped out of the window and jumped so far I landed out of the tornado. I rsn towards them and they ran away. we finally caught up with them at the top of a mountain and before we could talk, the whole city started collapsing and church steeples were flying through the air stabbing people and as some statue came towards us, we all hugged

Kirby, you were working as an architect

Kirby, you were working as an architect on Columbus with your dad. Kurt, you had your own optimist office. I was interviewing for a job (no idea what kind) so I was coming into town to visit. Neither of you had room for me to stay so I found a hotel downtown near both of your offices. First night, Kirby throws a huge party at her office and Kurt walks me home because turns out, I'm staying in the ghetto, not that close to where you work. Second night, Kirby throws another party and I leave early because of the interview. Well Kurt didn't want to leave (he found some cute nurse) so I decided to walk to the hotel alone. I got followed by three men in women's wigs and two little kids. They circle me about to attack me when the wind goes nuts. We look up and there are 6 tornadoes coming!!! I tried to call you guys but you wouldn't listen and hung up on me. I tried to make my way to you but had to duck into a nail salon. The tornadoes are going through town, sweeping people and buildings up but all pass the nail salon. Until the last one. It took the building and spun it and spun it and as we passed Kirbys office, you two waved at me with smiles! I was so pissed and sure I was going to die that I jumped out of the window and jumped so far I landed out of the tornado. I took of running towards you guys and you saw me and ran away. Lol we finally caught up with each other at the top of a mountain? Lol and before we could talk, the whole city started collapsing and church steeples were flying through the air stabbing people and as some statue came towards us, we all hugged and then I woke up